What a difference four years makes.
Aside from giving birth to my two children, December 5, 2013 is probably the day I am most proud of. For me, the beginning of my treatment meant 8 biweekly infusions, which was 14 weeks of chemo (that's 99 days!).
Compared to a lot of people I know who've gone through it, my experience with chemo wasn't that bad. But even "not that bad" when you're talking about chemotherapy is pretty damn awful.
Hours spent in the infusion room, chewing on ice or drinking a Sonic grape slush to help prevent mouth sores. Pulling my IV pole behind me as I paced the room because the premeds gave me restless legs. Hundreds of dollars wasted and hours spent freezing my head in an attempt to save my hair with cold caps (it didn't work). Pills, pills and more pills. Having to go back the day after each chemo to get a $10,000 injection (thank God for insurance) to boost my white blood cells. Migraines. Having no taste buds. Being queasy 24/7 and only having a handful of foods that were anywhere near tolerable. Rinsing my mouth a hundred times a day with Biotene to try to get rid of the nasty yuck taste. Feeling so damn tired every minute of the day. LOSING MY HAIR!!! (and my eyebrows... and eyelashes).
But you know what? I'm grateful for every one of those 99 days because I'M STILL HERE!
I'm happy and (relatively) healthy. I'm living my life. I'm loving my family. Aside from the routine checkups, I no longer spend hours at the doctor's office. My life doesn't revolve around blood draws and Germ-X. I'm able to work, go to football games, hug whoever I want, spend five days in Vegas with one of my besties, focus on a book for more than ten minutes, eat what I want, take my daughter to concerts, keep score at her softball games.
Chemo is harsh, and it's effects are awful and some never go away, but it killed my cancer and for that I'm eternally grateful.
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